Why is it that I do not seem to be able to get better with my cello? I am inconsistent, but, never get a good clear cello sound. I know what I am to do, I can do it during lessons, albeit scratchy and not very good, but after my lesson it goes downhill, very quickly. I am really getting disappointed.

I am really thinking that one issue may be that I did not get a good foundation with my first cello instructor. It was really bad. Plays lovely, but does not know how to teach.

The issues were that she did not work on basics with me: bowing, intonation, expression, no music theory at all, no scales because she did not like them, no exercises to promote good bowing or intonation, etc, just did song after song in Suzuki books (and she was a trained Suzuki teacher). Because of this, I know the basics, which makes it hard to advance.

I know where the notes are, bow hold, I can read bass, tenor and treble (alto, also), My knew instructor is really patient and encouraging. I know I can do this if I can go back and do the basics again, basically start over with bowing, fingering, etc to get the proper techniques. I have been going back to Suzuki 2 and working on three songs on my own, but that takes away from time on the lesson material. 

My idea is to ask my instructor to slow down. Ask to use the songs in book 2 to let me get my bowing perfected (I should be beyond the scratchy non-cello sound if I am doing Bach Bourrées, I would think), my intonation, etc. I have a hard time doing the two together. Fighting with the Bourrées does not help. So many string crossings, shifting, etc. I know how it is to be done, with simpler pieces I can somewhat do it, but I am not quite ready or able to put eighth notes, string crossings, shifts, etc together in a more advanced song. Out the window.

He knows that I can, and I know I could if I did not have songs at the level of Bach, as much as I love them. I feel like there is a big gap I am missing from when I got lessons from the first instructor to my current instructor. The first one had no structure or instruction, just song after song. I can’t help but think, that even though I had instruction before my current instructor, a lot of what should have been covered during that first instructor period was not covered. I did not know what I was not taught because I did not know what I should have been taught.

My plan, at Friday’s lesson is that I am going to show him the songs I am working on in Book 2. He is not a Suzuki fan, and neither am I, but there are some good songs to learn from in the books. I am going to explain my issue with bowing. I have been trying to get the scratchy out and get an actual cello sound, but that has made it worse and I have lost the proper bowing techniques completely. I feel like I am doing it wrong now, I had to adjust my hold at the knees due to the issues that are still ongoing, and that has not helped with technique, but I am trying to do it the normal way and ignoring my knee, but have now forgotten exactly how that is. 

It is so frustrating. I can hear the clock ticking. No not THAT clock. That clock is long gone. 😂 I can feel it only getting harder as the age and joint clock ticks. That might be part of my issue, but I think that the main issue is that there is a big chunk I am missing between the instructors. There are things that should have been honed with the first instructor that were ignored. Because I had had lessons before, the basics were assumed to have been taught. I did not know what I did not know. I know how these songs are to be played, I cannot get the technique to actually play them correctly.

I think that songs with “fewer notes” and less speed would allow me to pay more attention to bowing, help me remember more of the piece so I can prepare for the coming notes, get used to it, etc. Then when the bowing and cross strings, and preparing for the next notes becomes natural, I can move to more advanced pieces.

When I see these advance songs, it blows my mind. I know that I am not ready for pieces full of slurs, eighth notes and shorter, etc. I can shift, and understand that. I am not accurate, but getting better. Confidence is an issue, but the lack of confidence is due to really not being ready for those songs, I think. 

Any thoughts? My instructor is very good and patient, and very good at explaining with the songs and scales we are doing, but I don’t think I was clear in what I know, other than I had so many lessons before him. He really enjoys teaching and is excellent at it, I think that I am either not as quick as younger students, and/or I am lacking a lot of in between instructor info and technique. It may be that I am expecting too much at this point? I would like to get a piece down to where I am proud of it, it sounds like a cello, no scratchy bow, before we move on.