To begin with, I am ashamed because I must keep my name private. I live in Sibiu, Romania. I have studied violin since I was 7. I have gone through a lot in life and I am now 26. The violin was for me like a god and my teacher - he was like more than a parent for me - he was a remarkable person. 

I used to be a really really good violinist but there were a lot of ups and downs. I was not aware of the type of things that are required in order to become a great artist. I was pretty good up until high school. I have managed to finish the local high school of arts and I hold a certificate in violin - in legal terms, I am a certified musician and I can play pretty much wherever I want in my country. 

Now my teacher was pretty good - when I was a very very small kid he had this fantastic girl as a student. The room in which he taught violin to that remarkable student was very large. The sounds that came out of her violin were absolutely mind blowing in every way. Her attitude was simply out of this world, the way she handled her instrument was a subject of extreme and pure fascination for me. I was absolutely willing to go through heaven and hell and through the upmost torture just to become like her and astonish people. 

It did not take long until I was able to master the material. I made huge progress pretty fast and every teacher in my school was simply surprised by my abilities. When I used to play my violin I had that vision of that girl and all of my soul was in the song and all of my mind was on the outer beauty of that remarkable student. I can never forget this. I did receive a prize for my audition back then. 

Things did not last that long because I became engaged in all sort of dumb activities that high school students do. I began to ignore my violin even though I knew deep deep inside of my soul that it was an absolutely huge mistake to ignore studying. When I was a senior in high school I have realized that life is also about hard work and I began to work very hard on my goal to go to the music academy. I was simply not good enough and to be quite honest - going to a music academy in Romania means a lot as competition is absolutely huge and it is extremely tough - you need to work very very hard in order to survive in the first year at a music academy here. 

Unfortunately I was not able to go to that academy but I know that I am fully able to play almost anything that I want. I can even play Paganini but the unfortunate fact is that I had some personal problems... my brother went in jail... sold his violin... now I have barely been able to fix my old violin. The last time when I played my violin was at my local community college and I am thankful because of a great teacher that knew about my talents - she invited me in in order to get exposure. I was such an ignorant during my teens as I have not realized that exposure is absolutely critical in this industry... What can I do in order to recover after a 4-year-old break... I feel absolutely horrible in any single way... my real life career is ruined... I still do not have a stable job in a company... however I do not need one anyway... I feel as if I am incomplete without my violin and I am starting to ask myself what has prevented me to abandon my instrument for so long? now that I know what has prevented me I am sure that nothing will prevent me from studying and learning new songs on my violin but how can I prepare mentally after such a long break from studying? I feel so overwhelmed and excited in the same time... it is as if I have rediscovered myself once again.